Don Koch, otherwise known as King Don, moves to the suburbs to renovate a recently acquired house but quickly discovers the situation is far more complex than first anticipated when supernatural events begin occurring around him. To make things worse, his pregnant wife is scheduled to arrive in the coming weeks and Don falls into bad habits, before unearthing the fact that the house is plagiarised with a sordid past. An at times promising movie that didn’t quite deliver on a whole, but worth the watch for any CM Punk fan.

Director: Travis Stevens
Writers: Trent Haaga, Paul Johnstone
Starring: Phil Brooks, Trieste Kelly Dunn

It’s fair to say that the critics haven’t taken too well to the Girl on the Third Floor and it’s relatively easy to understand why. Throughout the flick you find yourself wondering when exactly something would happen of importance and when it eventually did, it was usually just a bitter disappointment. With that being said, the filmmakers did a half decent job in building up the suspense, but as previously stated, very little ultimately happened after building said suspense.

The plot and story was also one of confusion at times – large parts of it didn’t make too much sense along with the fact that the decision making from many of the characters was woeful on more than one occasion. There’s also the small fact that this was categorised as a supernatural horror – the supernatural part may be accurate, but the horror certainly wasn’t. Aside from one or two brutal attacks (with pretty good special effects), nothing of note stood out and there certainly wasn’t any elements that made you jump out of your seat.

In terms of the cast, Phil Brooks (CM Punk) adopted the position of Don Koch and did fairly well in the lead role. Don comes across as an unlikeable character for large amounts of the movie, especially after he hooks up with a seemingly innocent yet attractive “neighbour” early on. Only when the lady becomes an inconvenience in his life does he start calling a halt to the pair’s activities. In short, an adulterous character such as Don is probably not going to be universally liked by the viewers paying to watch the film. Trieste Kelly Dunn on the other hand, played the role of Liz Koch and aside from one or two questionable decisions that she made towards the end of the film, it’s easy to have sympathy for her after seeing the situation she found herself in.

Overall, a rather dark and at times disturbing film, but not the best way to spend ninety minutes of your time, unless of course, you like to squirm away at the special effects that a movie brings to the table. If you do, you may enjoy this one.

The Girl on the Third Floor is currently streaming on Netflix.

“Promise me you won’t say a word to Liz about last night?”

Don Koch – Girl on the Third Floor